All Over

On my home last night I real­ized that today is 1 month after mom died. The past month is mostly a blur, I remem­ber it, but it is hard to believe that I haven’t spo­ken with her for over a month. I miss her.

It began to hit me last night. I went to see “Meet the Robin­sons” in 3D. The movie was very cute and funny, though it didn’t really gain any­thing from 3D. The movie focuses on a young orphan who is aban­doned by his mom, I won’t go into it any fur­ther to avoid spoil­ing it for oth­ers — but it began to gen­tly bother me and I couldn’t watch the movie with­out images and mem­o­ries of mom float­ing through my head.

The drive home I sat in quiet con­tem­pla­tion. It was then that I real­ized what today marked and it all weighed on me. I had come off of such a good day. My improv class, the Orlando Magic win­ning, and hang­ing out with friends, but mom’s pass­ing really weighed on me and cast a shadow over it all.

My mind is all over the place today. It’s focus­ing on mom, on school, on SAK, on the pod­casts. I can’t focus on any­thing right now.